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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with When it happened, for example, Today or Yesterday. It ends with (Person who screwed you) youFml
  • - Please use good grammar and full spelling eg. 'u' NONO 'you' Yes!'
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Random youFML

Sort: All Time | Today Only | This Week | This Month | This Year

Yesterday, my girlfriend dumped me because I lost my football match. She said I didn't deserve to have her as a girlfriend because I made her lose face in front of her friends. FML (Oh) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (19) haha suck that! (12)

Apr 22, 2010 - Love - by freeza

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Today, I went to the park with my friend. There was this really hot guy there, and he kept looking my way. So I made it a point to look back at him too, and even flirt a bit. He walked right by me and my friend, and completely ignored me, but said to my friend "Hey," Teresa and Hot guy youFml (Oh) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (6) haha suck that! (8)

Jun 28, 2010 - Love - by Essence

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Today, I bought a new VolksWagen Golf GTI. While I was driving home, there was hail which were as big as golf balls. This was Melbourne's worse weather in 90 years. My car was badly dint and my insurance policy doesn't cover natural disasters. (nature) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (26) haha suck that! (12)

Mar 14, 2010 - Miscellaneous - by Jun

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Today, I woke up after a hangover so stayed at my friends. I was still very dizzy but hungry, so went to the kitchen to see what I could grab. There was nothing except some bread. I thought it was green tea bread because my friend was Asian. I ate 4 slices but only to knew they were moldy when my stomach told me. (moldy bread) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (4) haha suck that! (22)

Mar 18, 2010 - Health - by runner

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Today, I was eating an apple while watching TV. I just bought it at the supermarket and it cost $3.99 per kg. It was really juicy and tasty, As I chewed a few more bites I tasted something different, and it tickled my tongue but I swallowed it. I looked at the apple and saw a worm wiggling. (apples) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (13) haha suck that! (18)

Apr 21, 2010 - Miscellaneous - by healthbunny

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This morning, when i just woke up still in sleep mode, i walked out of my room and thought i saw a piece of chocolate on the floor. When i went to pick it up it was soft and warm. it was actually my chihuahua's poo!!! Yuck, right in the morning too! (chihuahua) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (7) haha suck that! (17)

Mar 27, 2010 - Miscellaneous - by Princess

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Yesterday, I was eating breakfast and my mum told us she had breast cancer. Me and my sister was terrified and worried. As I went upstairs, I overhead my step dad on the phone saying, 'babe! she's got cancer, how we going to celebrate!'. I got really angry, I rugby tackled him and gave him a bloody nose. Before he left with all his stuff he scratched my car. (step dad) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (145) haha suck that! (15)

Apr 4, 2010 - Health - by bigboy

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Last weekend, my boyfriend of 4 years, rang me to tell me he had a surprise. Being paranoid as it was, I asked him the obvious questions, was he cheating? I received a reply by text 2 hours later and was surprised it was him who stole my bra's and shoes. He was a cross dresser. (GERRY) youFML

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Last night, I walked into my parents room for help with homework. My English teacher (who was not my dad) was in bed with my mom. (mom and english teacher) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (189) haha suck that! (51)

May 12, 2010 - Love - by ScrewU

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Today, I saw lady gaga walking with her friend on the street. I yelled out to them to wait for me and they ignored me and kept walking. They heard me and said "keep walking". (lady gaga) youFML

Yeh, screwed to the max (5) haha suck that! (46)

May 17, 2010 - Miscellaneous - by Sluty Bitch!

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Today, I was at college and overhead an Indian guy say he wanted to get a tattoo but his mum did not let him. My friend said, \"no point getting one when your so dark, you can\'t even see it anyway.\" The Indian turned around and thought I said it. He threw his sandwich at me. FML
Today, I was delivering stock a customer ordered. Since I am the delivery guy, my license is the most important thing. I saw a hot girl jogging to my left. I didn\'t know I ran a red light and there was a red light camera in that intersection. Now I\'m at negative 3 points. Going to get fired for sure. FML (Oh) youFML