Today, I went to work about 15 minutes late as there was an accident on the freeway. The manager asked me why I was late and gave me a good telling off. He asked me to get him coffee so I did but I accidentally spilled it on him. Now I\'m not sure If I have a job tomorrow. FML
The other day, my boyfriend was almost home from his three week stay with his parents. I wanted to give him a surprise, so I started masturbating with a Popsicle. Unfortunately, it melted inside me. The stick had splinters and now my vagina is sore(Oh) youFML